Three Men On Tour: 36

I found her hiding by the entrance to the bar. It was obvious from her frequent glances in its direction that she had summoned the lift and was hoping it would arrive before she was forced to talk to me. I made the journey across the lobby swiftly and stepped in to cut off her path of escape.

“Elspeth. Wait.“

“I don’t want to talk to you.“ Her eyes were red raw and I don’t need to tell you what kind of man you feel like when you’ve made a girl cry.

“Elspeth, look I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say. It’s not…“

“What, it’s not me it’s you?“ she snapped. “Is that what you were going to say?“

“No, actually,“ I protested. “Well, not exactly. I was going to say that it’s not that I don’t want to. Hell, why wouldn’t I want to? You’re beautiful, you’re smart, you made me smile when I couldn’t find anything to smile about.“

“So…what then? Why don’t you want me?“ Elspeth tilted her head at me and I felt a falling sensation as I stared into the green of her eyes. It was hard to pull back.

“I want to,“ I breathed. “I just…can’t.“

“Oh,“ said Elspeth bluntly. “I should have known.“

“Should have known what?“

“That you were married.“

“But…“

“No, really, I mean it’s obvious isn’t it. You’re at a conference. You see a single girl, a pretty one if I say so myself, and you think ‘I’ll have a bit of that’. Then it’s off home to clueless wifey. It’s just perfect for you, isn’t it?“

“Not…exactly,“ I repeated. And then I told her everything. I told her about Alicia. I told her about the marriage proposal. I told her about George and Harry and my job and my boss and had there been time I’m sure I’d have told her my A level results and my shoe size. When I was done, I stood there looking at her slowly shaking her head and realised how hopeless it was to think she might forgive me.

“Come on,“ she said when the silence had become unbearable. “The bar’s over there and I think the both of us might need a drink.“